Fearing Divorce, Many Couples Avoid Marriage
Marriage rates are at an all-time low.
Summary: The fear of divorce is one reason why many committed
couples aren’t getting married, according to a new study. The Pew
Research Center’s survey found marriage rates are at their lowest point
ever, with only about half of American adults currently married. The
median ages for first marriages for both men and women have also
risen to new records.
In the new study, researchers conducted interviews with 122 people (61
couples interviewed as individuals) who lived with a partner in and
around Columbus, Ohio. The participants were divided into two groups,
middle-class and working-class, depending upon their education and
income. They were asked questions on several topics including their
thoughts and plans for marriage.
Middle-class participants were more excited about the prospects for
marriage, and they saw living together as being merely a stepping stone
to matrimony. Yet, some 67% worried about the potential for divorce
with its social, legal, emotional and economic consequences, not to
mention the consequences of divorce on children.
According to the researchers, divorce came up in 81 of 122 interviews,
and finding the right partner before entering a marriage was a big
concern for many of the respondents who indicated they wanted to “do it
right” and get married only once. Some reasons for deferring marriage
included not being ready to take it seriously, religious strictures against
divorce, and insufficient finances. The prominence of divorce in society
along with experiences with divorce among friends and parents had their
effect on the participants.
Working-class women had strong doubts about marriage and feared the
difficulty of exiting the institution if things didn’t work out. They were
twice as likely as middle-class women to fear being stuck in a marriage
with no way out if they had to rely on their spouse’s income. They saw
fewer benefits to being married and thought it would lead to more
responsibilities because of the “expectations” for a wife. Working-class
cohabitating couples were more likely to think of marriage as “just a
piece of paper” and were less likely to change their existing
relationships. Counselors working with these couples might want to get
them to clarify their expectations for household division of labor before
getting married.
To read the entire article, click on LIVE SCIENCE.
Comment: For people who see healthy families as forming the
foundation for a healthy society, having to witness the decline in the
institution of marriage is a cause for sadness and concern. How many of
our society’s problems with crime and poverty could be avoided if every
person would see marriage as an honorable estate and every child could
grow up in a family with a caring father and a loving mother?
It was God who instituted marriage when He brought together the first
couple, Adam and Eve. So we would do well to see what He has to say
about the subject. God says it is not good for man to be alone
(Genesis 2:18) and marriage He says is honorable (Hebrews 13:4)
(Proverbs 18:22). Marriages which produce children attract His blessings
(Psalm 127; Psalm 128). And for the sincere Christian, the chances of
ever having to face the agony of a divorce would be greatly reduced if
he/she married a sincere fellow Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14), so that
whatever each does will be done to the glory of God
(1 Corinthians 10:31).
To be sure, there are undoubtedly many single people who greatly
desire to get married but have not yet found their lifelong marriage
partner. (Even choosing to remain single is not in itself a sin —
1 Corinthians 7:1.) There are also married couples who greatly desire
children but have not been blessed by God with offspring. These
situations are among the “crosses” that we are told Christians must bear
(Matthew 10:38).
It is interesting that at times Jesus referred to Himself as a bridegroom.
“Jesus answered, ‘How can the guests of the bridegroom mourn while he
is with them? The time will come when the bridegroom will be taken
from them’” (Matthew 9:15). What a remarkable picture this presents —
a groom willing to give up His life for His guests and His bride, in this
case, His church (Ephesians 5:25-27). We therefore desire to honor
Jesus Christ for this greatest of all sacrifices, the giving up of His life for
us so that we can one day enjoy the marriage feast in heaven
(Revelation 19:9).
Marriage rates are at an all-time low.
Summary: The fear of divorce is one reason why many committed
couples aren’t getting married, according to a new study. The Pew
Research Center’s survey found marriage rates are at their lowest point
ever, with only about half of American adults currently married. The
median ages for first marriages for both men and women have also
risen to new records.
In the new study, researchers conducted interviews with 122 people (61
couples interviewed as individuals) who lived with a partner in and
around Columbus, Ohio. The participants were divided into two groups,
middle-class and working-class, depending upon their education and
income. They were asked questions on several topics including their
thoughts and plans for marriage.
Middle-class participants were more excited about the prospects for
marriage, and they saw living together as being merely a stepping stone
to matrimony. Yet, some 67% worried about the potential for divorce
with its social, legal, emotional and economic consequences, not to
mention the consequences of divorce on children.
According to the researchers, divorce came up in 81 of 122 interviews,
and finding the right partner before entering a marriage was a big
concern for many of the respondents who indicated they wanted to “do it
right” and get married only once. Some reasons for deferring marriage
included not being ready to take it seriously, religious strictures against
divorce, and insufficient finances. The prominence of divorce in society
along with experiences with divorce among friends and parents had their
effect on the participants.
Working-class women had strong doubts about marriage and feared the
difficulty of exiting the institution if things didn’t work out. They were
twice as likely as middle-class women to fear being stuck in a marriage
with no way out if they had to rely on their spouse’s income. They saw
fewer benefits to being married and thought it would lead to more
responsibilities because of the “expectations” for a wife. Working-class
cohabitating couples were more likely to think of marriage as “just a
piece of paper” and were less likely to change their existing
relationships. Counselors working with these couples might want to get
them to clarify their expectations for household division of labor before
getting married.
To read the entire article, click on LIVE SCIENCE.
Comment: For people who see healthy families as forming the
foundation for a healthy society, having to witness the decline in the
institution of marriage is a cause for sadness and concern. How many of
our society’s problems with crime and poverty could be avoided if every
person would see marriage as an honorable estate and every child could
grow up in a family with a caring father and a loving mother?
It was God who instituted marriage when He brought together the first
couple, Adam and Eve. So we would do well to see what He has to say
about the subject. God says it is not good for man to be alone
(Genesis 2:18) and marriage He says is honorable (Hebrews 13:4)
(Proverbs 18:22). Marriages which produce children attract His blessings
(Psalm 127; Psalm 128). And for the sincere Christian, the chances of
ever having to face the agony of a divorce would be greatly reduced if
he/she married a sincere fellow Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14), so that
whatever each does will be done to the glory of God
(1 Corinthians 10:31).
To be sure, there are undoubtedly many single people who greatly
desire to get married but have not yet found their lifelong marriage
partner. (Even choosing to remain single is not in itself a sin —
1 Corinthians 7:1.) There are also married couples who greatly desire
children but have not been blessed by God with offspring. These
situations are among the “crosses” that we are told Christians must bear
(Matthew 10:38).
It is interesting that at times Jesus referred to Himself as a bridegroom.
“Jesus answered, ‘How can the guests of the bridegroom mourn while he
is with them? The time will come when the bridegroom will be taken
from them’” (Matthew 9:15). What a remarkable picture this presents —
a groom willing to give up His life for His guests and His bride, in this
case, His church (Ephesians 5:25-27). We therefore desire to honor
Jesus Christ for this greatest of all sacrifices, the giving up of His life for
us so that we can one day enjoy the marriage feast in heaven
(Revelation 19:9).
LSI Blog - Friday, Dec. 30, 2011
